Go With The Flow

Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don't. Lately I have definately felt like a nut. When feeling out of balance, I don't want to do anything that I should or ought to do. I want to eat chocolate and sleep! Although yoga has helped keep me in balance, I still crumble into a heap at times & just can't pick myself up. These are the times when it is so hard to write and every time I do, my critic convinces me that it's crap so I hit delete and grab another bit of chocolate.

In funks like these the tendancy is to beat myself up. This prolongs the funk until something external finally breaks me out of it. This time it was a bright sunshiny spring like day.

The real reason we all suffer is called avidya or spiritual ignorance. We mistake the false self for the real, and step out of the flow of grace. Getting caught up in the head about this or that we fail to be present. It all comes down to a choice...to live from the inside out or the outside in?

It takes courage to commit to the path of spiritual growth. We must be willing to accept grace. It is one thing to give and quite another to humble yourself to receive this beautiful gift. A gift which whispers "you are enough" and "be here now." It is the voice of truth.

Going with the flow is knowing when to push and when to sit back and enjoy the ride or simetimes burrow. Listening inwardly you will know what each moment requires of you. After weeks of the funk in my trunk I am happy to be back in the flow of grace...finally able to hit the mat and the page with courage. It is stepping beyond mere survival into that which we are meant to be. Knowing all this, I will attest to the importance of accepting the crippling goo as part of the journey. As well as being gentle with your self in the process.

"Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:13-14

Shine Out

"There is a force within which gives you life - seek that.

In your body lies a priceless gem - seek that.

Oh wandering soul, if you want to find the greatest treasure don't look outside,

look inside - seek that."

-Rumi

It is human nature to serve others. If someone is hurt the natural tendancy is to help. This was made evident as the whole world scrambled to help those suffering in Heiti. In serving others, it is easy to get burned out and miss the joy. To give joyfully, it is important to first fill the reserves. When you sit in stillness you connect to source and recognize truth and abundence. From this place, grace may flow through you into the lives of those in need.

In yoga, we were taught muscular integration. This is when you recruit muscular energy by drawing into a central focal point in the body (i.e.solar plexus). From this place of power you shine that energy back out to fuel the pose. It works magic and suddenly you are able to relax into the poses almost effortlessly. This, like all of life, is about stepping into the flow of grace. So many times we swim upstream, gasping and flailing, wondering why we can't catch a break. We choose to live life from a place of poverty consciousness. Then one day, we awaken to the fact that maybe there is a better way.

When describing the practice of meditation, my teacher, Rolf Gates, said "It is doing the one thing that takes care of the 100 things." So as we voraciously attack the to do list, we get to the bottom only to find that the list has multiplied and there will always be more to do. This leaves a feeling of frustration and discontent. It robs you of your peace and leaves you striving even more diligently to get it all done.

Thomas Kelly says "Life from the center is one of unhurried peace and power." This is where I would love to come from, but the work is hard and persistant. As the demands of life ebb and flow I am quick to fall off the mat and the cushion putting my spiritual practice on the back burner. This is when I suffer. Instead, commit to the practice and live life from the center. You will be glad you did.

Love is...

"Love is patient,
Love is kind.
It does not envy,
it does not boast,
it is not proud.
It is not rude,
it is not self-seeking,
it is not easily angered,
it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects,
always trusts,
always hopes,
always perseveres.
Love never fails..." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

This definition of love, found in the Bible is read at many weddings including my own. When things are challenging between Kevin and I, I often refer back to this definition to assess where I may be falling short and how I may be able to love more completely. It is the ultimate challenge, but one worth fighting for. It is easy to pinpoint where your spouse or loved one is failing to meet your needs, but that doesn't usually help to change the problem. We can only change ourselves and when we love in this way and without conditions the problems melt away.

In yoga, we demonstrate love by observing the first two limbs of the practice which include the yamas (moral restraints), and niyamas (observances). These include: nonharming, honesty, nonstealing, moderation, nonhoarding, purity, contentment, zeal, self-awareness, and surrender. These provide a safe parameter in which to live and love in this world. In his book, Meditations from the Mat, Rolf Gates writes, "Love is being who we are born to be. Love is being who we are. The aim of yoga is to become still, to learn to reside in our truth. When we are surrendering to God, we are surrendering to the truth in us and the truth in all beings"

The first step to loving others is loving yourself. This is tied in with the first yama which is ahimsa or nonharming. It is easy to love your friends,but we must also learn to love ourselves in this same way. Since childhood, I was taught "Love your neighbor as your self." I thought I understood until a year ago when my friend explained that we are to love ourselves as we love our dearest friends. I am sure that you have a long record or internal dialog of every mistake you have made since birth. It is easy to become angry when you mess up...yet again. We can extend grace to our fellows, but won't allow ourselves to receive it. When you fail to love yourself, as God's finest creation, you are harming yourself and contributing to the worlds great suffering.

Love is a verb. Today, put in practice the love of self by doing something nice for you. There was a quote hanging in my first classroom which read, "When each person in the world takes better care of themselves, every person will feel better taken care of, and then we may finally begin to take better care of one another." It starts with you! Be patient, kind, forgiving and hopeful that today is the day when you realize that you are perfect and whole...a work in progress, formed in the very likeness of God. This is the truth of who you are. You are a reflection of God, and "God is Love." (1John4:8)